..third time a charm or not?

Today I went in for my THIRD visit, and I'm really starting to feel the pain of internal organs trying to settle in their new spots.  Some are being pulled while other parts are being pushed.  I keep in mind that in the long run it's worth it, and this is the first time in 33 yrs I've felt RELIEF!  

This morning I woke up quite early; I was up by 4:45am, which is two hrs earlier than normal.  I did go to bed at 9:30p the night before because as soon as I felt a little tired I get straight to bed.  I typically cannot fall asleep that early or right away, but I felt my eyes get heavy, so I hit the hay.

During the day I had pretty good energy, but I times did feel exhausted.  I know after talking to the doctor after my third session that it's okay for me to hit the gym, and SLOWLY do some back work; nothing heavy.  I need to work up the muscles that are being made "weak".  I know it sounds weird that I'm working muscles that are being made weak, but I'm strengthening them.  

After my session the doctor invited me to his workshop/seminar on how to help yourself when in pain.  He gave us great advice on what we can do when we are under stress, back aches and such.  We got a handouts to show us what areas to hit for what conditions.  I will use these as aids for in between my session, and a regular basis.  

 I go back on Tuesday and then come up with a game plan with my doctor.  We shall discuss how regularlly I will get my session, and what herbs/nutrients I should try to help.  Over all I AM pleased with this experience.  I even made a friend today at the seminar.  We chatted a bit afterwards, and it was nice to be able to talk to someone who gets it.  Someone who understand chronic pain, and how it affects many facets in one's life. Sleep, work, body, emotionally, and spiritually.  My life has NEVER been easy, but I hope and pray that this is the road to my happiness and less pain for a good part of my life...

Let's do this again...

Monday I had my second session of acupuncture, and it went well. This time it did hurt a little bit, but I knew to endure it as it'll help me in the long run. My neck loosened up quite a bit, but today it's back to being stiff. I have the issue with my back where at times it feels week, but that constant pain has really lessened.  
I now need to incorporate gym session to strengthen up the weaker muscles; I do have to take it easy. I regularly feel pain as everything is being moved a bit internally. I had dinner a little bit ago, so now I'm in some pain.  
Tomorrow is my third session, and we shall see what the plan of action and cost will be. I'm really worried about that, but I guess that's what the credit card is for if I need to. If I can get this campaign kick it it'll avoid me having to do so. This is NOT covered by my insurance; even though it's a chronic issue I have.  
In all I'm VERY glad that I gave this a try. I do find myself having to hold my back straight, but I guess it's expected. 

...I'd rather just die...

     It's been three days since my acupuncture visit, and so far it's been quite interesting.  Thursday night I took a melatonin pill to help me sleep, and to see if my back would get better.  I kept waking up throughout the night, so I'd straighten my body as much as possibly. I still got pretty good sleep, and even woke up earlier than expected.  As soon as I woke up I felt my back to see if it felt straight at all, and it still seemed pretty decent.

   Friday night I had a wedding to attend of a close friend I've had since 4th grade, and my back help up for the most part.  There were many times were it felt a bit weak, so I didn't dance like crazy.  Typically I'd dance the night away and just enjoy myself; not this time.  

Saturday rolled around, and I decided to hit the gym a little and soak my back.  I started to get that extreme pain against my ribs.  I didn't realize it was going to rain, which is why I was in pain.  The pain was pretty bad; I even started to feel like I wanted to toss my cookies.  

Sunday I got up, and my back feels pretty decent.  I went and got a massage, because I felt my lower back that a bone around my backside was started to stick out from what I had done.  

I figure that between massage, acupuncture, and going to the gym should do me well if I keep along this route in the progression I am seeing thus far.  

( Oh!  so let me back track.  I went locally to a store that is like a boutique locally that is closing, and got chatting with two ladies there.  I find out that the one lady's grandchild has scoliosis as well, and also went to Alfred I. DuPont hospital.  She mentioned how the "child" got kicked out when he/she turned around 20.  I was stunned!....  I was told I could not go anymore, and I wasn't even 15 yet.  What gives?! That REALLY pisses me off, because I never got the care I should have as a child or teen with this condition. )

I am in pain as my organs are being pushed around, and something inside aren't used to being moved, so some are being pushed to a different area, while other are being pulled; ouchie!  Being forward is NOT comfortable at all, but I'll take it over lessened pain and better hip rotation.  I seem to have more energy as it's not being wasted on dealing with the pain; at least that's MY assessment.  I did take a small nap/rest today, because I could feel my back was tired.  

I understand that my back is NOT cured by any means, and it'll never look normal.  At least the pain is less, the curve seems less, and maybe they can do another type of surgery from allowing it to go back to what it was; we shall see what happens.  One of my biggest concerns right now is cost.  I am not sure if I am going to be able to afford this.  

Tomorrow is my second session, and that's the end of my GROUPON deal; two sessions.  I shall then discuss with the doctor, and see what the charge is per visit, and then for the nutrition/vitamin portion.    

Hopefully the GOFUNDME starts to pick up, and this is finally getting movement, and I would LIKE to keep it going.  I finally feel like I've been given yet another change at life.  Just within the last few weeks I've been in SO much pain that I've caught myself thinking to myself how I'd rather just die than deal with this pain every day.  Unless you have chronic pain you have no idea what I'm dealing with.  I feel so alone and abandoned when it comes to this.  I have no where to turn, and not sure what to do...  Hopefully what I'd doing is something that will work for MANY yrs. to come.  

This COULD be life changing for me...